Hair Regimen For Relaxed Hair

This hair regimen is for relaxed hair, as I am constantly reminded relaxed hair is weaker than natural hair and needs extra care and attention. This is a typical regimen, as usual it is just a guide for persons who may not have a regimen. Feel free to tweak the information here at will.

Post Relaxer- 4-6 weeks

Shampoo:

Shampoo hair every week using organic shampoo. The week after the relaxer add a drop or two of rosemary or lavender oil and a teaspoon of olive oil or coconut oil to your   shampoo. The hair needs some extra moisture as it went through a process that can be drying to hair. Try not to use shampoos with sulfates in them. If you have no other choice but to use a sulfate laden shampoo, oil your scalp and hair shaft with olive, coconut or castor oil the night before you wash.

Condition:

Use a deep conditioner that has both protein and moisture combo. Persons ask me to recommend products all the time where this is concerned. However, I feel that whatever your hair likes you should stick to it. Most persons have an idea of what deep conditioner works best for their particular hair after several trial and error sessions.

Deep Condition with added egg as a protein on the fourth week. Try to do this once per month until you relax your hair again. However, if your hair does not need it, don’t try it. I misread my hair the other day and deep conditioned with protein and it took two weeks to feel normal and moisturized again.

Moisturize your hair as often as it is needed. If ends feel dried out and fried, you can use a cream based moisturizer like ORS Carrot Oil or something else that has water as a first ingredient.

Avoid Heat, try to use it only once per month, if it all. Especially avoid it when your hair is newly relaxed. Applying heat to hair is actually adding a new process to your strands. You will see added volume and bounce to relaxed hair when you avoid heat and only use it sparsely. Try to air-dry hair when possible.

Post Relaxer- 6-12 weeks and beyond.

This is transitioning territory for some people, the new growth is coming in and you have to adjust the way you treat your hair at this time because you have two textures.

Pre-Shampoo

It is a good time to pre-shampoo. This is in an effort to make your hair softer overall. Check out some of the pre-shampoo recipes on this site:

Thin Edges Honey Pre-Shampoo Recipe

Pre-Shampoo Treatment for Shedding Hair

Thursday Night Hot Oil Cocktail

The key to pre-poo is to basically  use any combination of carrier oil with an essence oil or if you do not have any essence oils use a carrier oil, heat it up and apply overnight. My personal favorite is Thursday Night Hot Oil Cocktail because I use it, or a variation of it, to pre-poo my hair on a regular basis. Additionally, you can add a carrier oil to your favorite conditioner and let it sit on your hair overnight.

Shampoo: This is the time to use a non-drying shampoo. Use baking soda for a week or two and wash your hair. I recommend doing this only after a pre-poo (if your hair is dry) for best results.

Condition: You can get fancy with your ordinary conditioner and add your favorite carrier oil (about 3 teaspoons, you don’t want your hair to be too greasy) , along with an essence oil and co-wash your every three days, especially if you exercise and sweat in your hair.

Deep Condition: your hair every week when you are this far post-relaxer. Deep condition after every shampoo. You can deep condition your hair without using store bought products. Check out:

Coconut and Yogurt Conditioner For Transitioning Hair

Tutti Frutti Deep Conditioner Recipe

Otherwise use the conditioner that works best for you, you can add your favorite oils for added moisture or add egg, yogurt or molasses for added protein to your regular deep conditioner.

Moisturizers: Do not let your hair get dry and frizzy. Use a water based liquid moisturizer at this time and then seal with a wee bit of carrier oil. Some good spray moisturizers are S-curl activator (add a little fragrant oil if you can’t stand the smell) and Ultra Black Hair Silky Spray Moisturizer.

Or better yet make your own. These days I use a hair rinse (like mint) added to glycerine and then seal with carrier oil. Here are two moisturizing recipes that you can use to refresh your hair:

Rosemary and Lavender Moisturizer For Hair

Basic Homemade Leave In Conditioner and Hair Moisturizer

Stay Away From Heat at this time. Try to air dry as much as possible at this time.

Products on the Black List for Relaxed Hair: Any product that contains alcohol, any shampoo that contains harsh chemicals, and any hair oil that contains petroleum/petrolatum or mineral oil, synthetic hair dyes.

47 Comments »

  • Nikia said:

    I’m sort of confused on how often a week do you pre-poo your hair and when do you regularly shampoo your hair during the Post Relaxer time period. My hair is relaxed and around week 6 or 7 my hair starts to shed and turns dry and brittle. I was my hair every 10 days and it never fails around this time. I try to air dry my hair to reduce heat, but my hair gets tangled, thick, and dry. Even when I add Pink moisturing oil. What would you recommend?

    • Brenda said:

      Hi Nikia,

      I pre-poo my hair before using store bought shampoos. This means that if I am not going to use any shampoo with sulfates I rarely pre-poo.
      These days because I have ramped up my exercise regime, I have to wash my hair every day or every other day especially when I do cardio and sweat in my hair. I generally rinse my scalp with a tea rinse. To avoid the dry, brittle feeling I use a small amount of hair butter or my castor oil when my hair is still damp. Before you air dry, make sure that the hair is smooth, comb it out or detangle it and when it is damp (not extremely wet or beginning to dry) put your oil on it starting from the ends to seal in the moisture.

  • Jasmine said:

    Hey, my hair is almost always dry, and its not really that long its a little above my shoulders, its thin, and the back is not completely bald but it just wont grow. This is where I decided that I need a hair regimen and so I get that I need to moisturize my hair every night and stay away from the flat iron( I use it almost every morning) and i get that i need to trim my split ends every once in a while, but im still confused on all these different washing’s I have to do. Im turning 15 on the 20th of June, and I would like to see improvement in my hair all over. Can you please reccomend a few oils I can moisturize my hair with, and any suggestions you can give me about the back of my hair not growing ?

    • Brenda said:

      Hey Jasmine,

      I see that you know the basics, within a few weeks of constantly being good I am sure that your hair will show signs of improvement all over. My favorite oil is castor oil, you can see why here. Other recommendations are in this article. All the best.

  • Scottia said:

    Hello,
    I’m Native American and my hair is beyond kinky and I was considering an at home relaxer because my hair is so hard to manage. All of my sisters have had them before and my oldest sister does them regularly I was just wondering if you thought I should try it as well or if there is some other product I can use to straighten it without heat or chemicals. I know that my hair has the right texture for a relaxer and I would definitely take care of it and keep it up but I just wish I didn’t have to chemically treat it but nothing else lasts. If I look at water my hair naps back up. Lol
    Thanks for your help,

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi,
      Beyond Kinky? Wow! That means it is fragile and should be treated with TLC. I understand what you are saying about not wanting to chemically treat your hair yet getting it straight or curly without the chemicals, I think there are several women who feel the same way. There are products that can temporarily straighten the hair, I explored some of them here in this article-Alternative To Relaxers For Straighter Hair or Defined Curls. However, if you are considering an at home relaxer, I would suggest a no-lye solution with added conditioners. My favorite relaxer is Affirm, I have tried others but Affirm is my absolute favorite. All the best on your decision. Have you ever thought of sister locks?

  • Mandy said:

    Hello I’m new to this site and I already love it.
    I have a problem, I relaxed my hair last week and whenever I comb it, there’s always hair in the comb I use a wide tooth comb. Can you please help me with what I should do?

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Mandy,

      Welcome, glad that you could stop by. There are a host of reasons why this could happen(over-processing, nutrition, uneven processing-the list could go on). But since you mentioned that this was after a relaxer treatment, my immediate thought is that your hair needs a protein treatment. DC your hair with a protein treatment (Aphogee 2 step protein treatment is a good choice). After that do a DC (with a mild protein/moisture deep conditioner) every other week till your hair stops shedding.

      • Mandy said:

        Thank you so much, will it be okay if I used eggs for my protein treatment instead. Would you please recommend a mild protein/moisture deep conditioner to me. Thanks again.

  • ange said:

    OMG finally someone who can help I am mixed race and was brought up by white parents who do not have a clue about afro hair. I relax my hair roughly about every 8 weeks and from reading this site I realise that my hair breakage at around 6 weeks is my hairs way of saying it needs more moisure. I have tried the coconut cream and yoghurt conditioner which was good but I also use doo groo triple strength leave in conditioner and realise that the main ingredient is mineral oil. Do you have a good leave in daily conditioner you can recommend or a recipe for one and am I ok to relax it now and then look after it by this regime.

  • Mimi said:

    Hello Ms. Barrett,
    I have decided to start a relaxed hair journey. My natural hair is 4C, and I wanted to know the best way to go about wearing relaxers, while also switching between braids and weaves. I like to keep my weaves in for about 2 months. Whenever my hair has been without a relaxer,the new growth gets very dry, hard to maintain, and starts to shed (especially when not freshly washed). My hair is pretty strong and probably would be ok with frequent relaxer (every 6 weeks), but I did not want to take any chances. I wanted to know what the best way would be to go about transitioning between weaves relaxers and braids. Is it safe to get a relaxer before a weave so as to reduce shedding when the weave is taken out?

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Mimi,
      I wouldn’t recommend getting a relaxer before a weave. When the hair is relaxed it is weaker and the weave is attached to the root of the hair, this will make your hair root even more vulnerable to shedding/breaking. You can moisturize your hair even with the braids in, so that your hair is not as dry when you take them out.

  • Melissa miller said:

    Hi Brenda

    i’ve been having this issue for soo long now. i keep reading the blgs on hair care and its frequently mentioned to avoid hair products with alcohol, petroleum, mineral oil (to name a few). i can’t seem to find products that does not contain some form of alcohol and some of the other black list products. Could you give me an example of a product that has the ideal ingredients so i can see what i’m to look for. Please! Thanks for all your other advice.

  • Pls Help! said:

    omg I love ur site! I’m relaxed and I’m working on my regimen and it’s going well. Before my hair was consistently dry and brittle unless it was wet basically, and now its soft, flexible and it looks healthy for the most part. I try not to use heat, I only blow dry/flat iron every 2 or 3 months, but I’m wondering if u can help with a styling issue. Im pretty simple and usually am wearing my hair in a bun or something, but I’m not sure how to best let my hair air dry after like 8 wks post?
    If I just detangle and put a scarf on, when I wake up my hair is kinda matted and hard to manage without a hard bristled brush I don’t want to damage my hair by using a hard brush for so many weeks until I relax again.
    I’ve started to use Bantu knots to keep my hair untangled and moisturized and it works, but then in some places the curls look great and others suck, and when I try to put it in a bun the curls won’t brush out and my hair looks crazy! How can I best style or wrap my hair after rinsing it out to lock in moisture and prevent knots and matting? Thanks,

    Sorry it’s so long!

  • Naomy said:

    Hey, I like your site a lot & being a newbie with relaxed hair, I will be following your regime.

    However I have a question, what is the regime for 0-4 weeks after relaxing my hair since you have posted from week 4 and above? I’m absolutely clueless and would appreciate any sort of tips to keep my hair healthy :)

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Naomy,
      Follow the same steps for week 4-6. And all the best with your relaxed hair. Take care of it and it will look gorgeous.

  • Nicole brown said:

    I am relaxed and I look and feel my best when I wear my hair down. I achieve that look by wrapping every night and applying rollers after washes and relaxing. However when I get to six weeks post I notice breakage when wrapping my hair. Basically, how can I maintain down look?

  • muma said:

    Hi Brenda,

    I just had my hair relaxed and wanted to find out how long I should wait before I do a protein and deep condition?

    Thanks in advance.

  • taylor said:

    Hi,
    I love your site but I just wanted clarification on the regime. once i’ve had the relaxer the first 4 – 6 weeks what is the exact process is it: pre-wash every week, shampoo, condition, deep condition and then a protein treatment once a month? is a deep condition the same as a treatment? when do I do the hot oil treatment, is that also every week?

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Taylor,
      That should be 0-6 weeks. I am going to change it to avoid confusion. The exact process is: Shampoo, Condition, Deep Condition once per month (it can be done with protein as needed).
      Yes, some people call deep conditioning a hair treatment.
      The hot oil treatment really makes a difference to really dry hair every week but every other week is fine too.

  • taylor said:

    I have dry, thick, relaxed hair, what shampoo, conditioner, deep condition and oil treatment would you recommend?

  • owusua said:

    hello…my hair is relaxed and i have no hair care regime….i relax every 6 weeks,i roll set and keep washing frequently till my next relaxing or when i braid or something….my hair is very dry but i dnt like grease in it,my hair is brittle and the ends dont look healthy…i occasionally steam my hair(dont know if this is good or not)….my question is what do i put in my hair after its dry cos my hair looks dry when i dont put pomade but i hate when its greasy

  • stella o said:

    hello,

    my hair is relax and it tangles up really bad with every shampoo I have been using so far. that makes my hair shed a lot and have losing lots of hair for years now. how can I keep my hair healthy?

  • Edrie said:

    I have a bit of a crisis!! ‘Bit’ I guess is putting it mildly.

    I’m about 8 weeks post relaxer and two days ago I dyed my hair at home. I know very little about dye so I asked someone working at the beauty supply store where I bought the weave, she recommended a brand called “Boe” (there’s an accent on the E). The reason I dyed my hair is because I put in extensions and I wanted my leave out to blend.

    I rinsed my hair, applied the dye, put on my plastic cap and sat under the dryer for 30 minutes. Then I washed as I regularly do.

    The problem is the dye made my hair SUPER HARD and I was detangling and detangling but nothing helped. I practically finished my conditioner. My conditioner usually makes my hair baby soft immediately but even after 15 minutes under my plastic cap I had the same results.

    I detangled as best as I could and added my leave-in conditioner. When it was about 80% dry I put on my satin cap and went to bed.

    I honestly didn’t know what to do and I already had my appointment for my installation so I went ahead and got my weave put in. Now I am terrified that my hair is slowly breaking and becoming brittle under my relaxer and after a few weeks my edges will be all thin!!!

    Today I made a ‘moisturizing mix’ with two of my favorite leave-in conditioners and some water. I added that to my tracks and I sprayed the leave I conditioner on my leave out hair.

    I don’t know what else to do. I don’t have oil – basically because I don’t know what oil to buy (as far as brand is concerned). Also are there any hair reconstructors you might recommend?

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Edrie,
      You should have taken care of your hair before you put the weaves in. If you are very concerned you should take out the weave and rehabilitate your hair. The suggestions above are great way to start.

  • Miranda Scott said:

    Hi. I waned to know what to do about tangled, shedding hair. I have relaxed hair and it was fine until I started going swimming. My hair has been really dry for like 2 weeks and I wanted to know what kind of products or treatments I can use to get my hair back to normal. It doesn’t look damaged or anything. I just got a relaxer and a trim but it is still a little more tangled then usual.

  • cheryl said:

    Hi. I was wondering, all advice seems to say to avoid heat products or use monthly etc. I have a concave Bob style at the moment and have been using straighteners to curl my ends under my chin. I need to do this daily.can you advice how I can maintain my style without using heat products because I will struggle. Thanks

  • Shauneese said:

    What do you mean when you say “use baking soda for a week” as a non-drying shampoo? Do I mx it with water, if so, how much? I am a little confused on how exactly to use baking soda.

    One more question, do you have an organic shampoo you can recommend for me to use weekly? I have short, relaxed, thick hair but am experiencing a lot of shedding and breakage, which I figured will go away with going back to the basics. Right now I am using Creme of Nature, Argan Oil Sulfate-Free Moisture and Shine Shampoo.

    I love your site btw. I use to have amazing hair as a kid/teen and now realize it was due to rules like no to very little heat, air drying, keeping it moisturized etc.

    I am also trying an egg treatment for the first time. Wish me luck :)

    Thanks so much!

  • rs said:

    HI
    Ibb have short hair and just took braids out of my hair very think and a mess. I relaxed my hair and I don t think the relaxed took to my hair fully (the back) I am going to my hairdresser for cut but canI relax my hhair again? I really want to

  • natasha said:

    hi i have relaxed hair i treat my hair every week,i don’t blow dry only set but after all of that when brushing out the curl my hair always shedding why is that

  • Princess said:

    Hi Brenda
    After years of wasting money on hairdressers and hair products. I started to research about how to care for my hair. I am Nigerian but live in England. A few months ago, my hair started breaking and shedding uncontrollably. I purchased the Aphoogee protein/keratin treatment collection but I must have overdone it because even though the breaking and shedding stopped after one application, I continued doing it for a week and my hair continued to fall out and became very hard.

    I have up and stopped the treatment and cut my hair off. Now I have healthy re growth and following your aforementioned. I did an intensive protein treatment 3days ago and I retouched my hair today followed by 2 min reconstructor by Aphoogee. I then neutralised and deep conditioned with my favourite conditioner mixed with a few drops of Lavender am Peppermint oil. I then added my favourite carrier oils such as jojoba, castor,olive oil and Moroccan Argan oil. I covered my head with cling film and sat under the dryer for 15-20mins. After rinsing with lukewarm to cold water, I put some leave in and diluted setting lotion in my hair, set in rollers and dried under my hooded dryer. After 40mins my hair was dry, full bounce, shiny and healthy looking. I managed to give it a good basic trim. (My husband even commented on my healthy locks). I flat wrapped my hair and styled out afterwards.

    My question is: what regimes am I to continue with now? I was gonna cowash in a week then deep condition with oil in two weeks time. A mild protein/keratin in 4 weeks and an intensive protein in the next 6 to 8 weeks. I was going to braid my hair for the remaining 4 weeks left before I touch up my new growth.

    Please help with this matter.

    • Brenda Barrett said:

      Hi Princess,
      Check out the regimen section of the site. Please remember that protein especially a strong one like Aphogee should only be used if you think your hair needs intensive protein. Otherwise, it can make your hair hard and break it. Since your hair is doing so well now, go light on the protein for a while. Check out htis article. Moisture and Protein

  • tanzania said:

    Hey my hair is extremely course.it was a twa with only a inch of new growth.I couldn’t stand my naps so now I’m trying to grow my hair but scared it’ll be t o nappy to take care of post relaxer.I’m use to going a 4weeks each then get relaxer .I also want to color my hair honey blonde but it has black permant dye in it so I can only bleach it out but then my hair flaws out and I have to start all over with twa.its vicious cycle but I really need your advice..Please HELP! Thank u:-)

  • shaks said:

    i have heard of textlaxing so wanted to try it. i was told all u have to do is add oil to the relaxer, oil to the hair and then add the relaxer to the new growth and then under process the hair (cut the time by 1/2 or less) I did that and my hair came out not quite bone straight but it does not look as pictures i’ve seen of texlaxed hair where the hair has some kink to it (definition as if it were transitioning) my hair has come out a bit thick yes however i don’t know if i got this quite right. please help me. i want to know if what i did was right and if not what went wrong.

  • Sonya said:

    I’m so confused as too what products to purchase without breaking the bank. I got a terrible short hair cut in November, and I do mean terrible I’ve been getting it trim me the last trim was February and it’s growing. I really don’t know what protective style to go with. It’s tapered in the back the sides are growing back, did I mention I now wear wigs so i French braid what I can to the back. I don’t have a hair regimen. Please help!

  • Joy said:

    Hi yah,
    what a wonderful site you have. I stumbled onto it while doing a search for what to do to save my hair. I have always fixed weave for the last 7 years and my front hair at the edges have all cut. I am trying to grow them back and my hair is relaxed too. But my problem is that I have very fine hair so when I style it has no weight or volume any advice on how to add volume to my hair please.
    keep up the good work, love your articles and advice.

  • Jessica said:

    Is it health to wash processed hair everyday? If not, how often and why is that so?

  • Kelli S. said:

    Hello,
    I have relaxed hair just past my shoulders, and I haven’t gotten a relaxer since February, so I’m going on 3 months. I just decided that I want to go completely natural. As for deep conditioning my hair, what is the order for shampooing, conditioning, and then deep conditioning? Should I shampoo, condition, then use something like coconut oil as a deep conditioner? And if I do deep condition last, do I simply rinse it out or shampoo it out? Or should I deep condition with coconut oil and then proceed with my normal shampoo and conditioner?

  • Tonnette said:

    Hello Brenda, I just happen to come across your page while browsing and I love it. I’ve pretty much started my hair journey four (4) days ago, prior to that I was 3mths post relaxer but i didnt moisturize or anything during that time. I only used a braid spray for itching, now my problem is that I’ve read all the do’s and donts for my hair journey but I’m a bit confused. 1.If I do a hot oil treatment, can I still co-wash, deep condition and leave in conditioner in a week? 2.How often should I do a protein treatment? 3.How do I do a protein treatment or deep contion while Im wearing a protective hairstyle e.g sew in weave or braids or how exactly do I care for my hair while in a protective style? Thanks in advance.

  • Rashonda said:

    Nutress Hair products has a great hair repair system. They help prevent hair breakage, dryness, and improve the overall health of your hair. The protein treatment and the leave-in conditioner are the best ! These products are a must have for your hair regimen :)

  • Debbie said:

    hi Brenda.
    My hair is dry!!!!! and has refused to grow. it grows for a while den stops growing. it breaks too nd right now I have a very annoying dandruff. I av never trimmed my hair or treated it. so I just bought some hair products but I do not know how or when to use them. I have aphogee leave in conditioner, aphogee 2 step protein treatment, tea tree deep nourishing conditioner, natures gentle touch deep conditioning cholesterol treatment, Palmers coconut oil formula, oil of palma christi castor oil, natures gentle touch conditioning shampoo, tea tree anti dandruff…*sighs*(they cost a fortune) my hair is relaxed by the way nd am almost 3 months post relaxer. help me plssssssss. need my hair to be long nd dandruff free

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